It's admittedly a bit difficult to find someone who can speak with moral authority specifically to dating apps in the Catholic world. Because of the very recent explosion of smartphones, followed by the subsequent explosion of dating apps, or because of vows of celibacy, many clergy and moral experts have actually never used dating apps themselves. Even though he's a young priest and friar who's never used Tinder, Fr. Plow works with hundreds of young people every day as the director of Households at Franciscan University of Steubenville, Ohio kind of like Greek houses, but faith-based.
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Plow said when Catholics determine the morality of any act or tool, like Tinder, three things must be considered. Like most other technologies, they are morally neutral in and of themselves," he said. The transitory, cursory nature of swiping based on one picture in Tinder can be morally dangerous if that same mentality transfers to relationships with people, he said. Instead of pausing and taking the time to form real relationships, some people may decide to move on to the next best thing because they have so many options.
How a Catholic should deal with Tinder and other dating apps
Mary Beth Bonacci, a Catholic speaker and author on John Paul II's Theology of the Body, said what's concerning about Tinder when compared to online dating sites such as CatholicMatch is the rapidity with which people can be turned into objects. We get so wrapped up in thinking about what we want for ourselves that we forget we are dealing with another human person - and image and likeness of God. It's always been a temptation," she said. That is what is scariest to me. Bonacci said while it's possible to find someone who's interested in a virtuous dating relationship through apps like Tinder, the chances of that happening are probably pretty low when compared with online dating sites that have more extensive profiles.
Meeting someone in person as soon as possible is also key, she said, in determining whether or not a match made online or in an app has a chance of turning into a dating relationship. But apps like Tinder aren't exactly helping breathe new life into romance, she said. The nearly-anonymous sex is of course the antithesis of anything romantic or respectful. In the old days of the 'meat market' singles' bar, a person had to get dressed up, leave the house, buy a few drinks and at least pretend to have some real interest in the other person.
The Church has a duty, she said, to offer young people better alternatives in the dating world than the instant gratification that they find in the current culture.
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We can't scare them out of it. They need to be inspired, to fall in love with the real beauty of the Christian vision of human sexual morality," she said. We can't allow another generation of kids to fall into this cesspool.
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